I got an email yesterday that compelled me to write this post as a great example of using both personalization and personality to get someone interested in you and your startup:
Subject: CloudLock Logo’d Stuff
So this is probably one of the stranger emails you’ll receive today, but I’m sending this because we thought you’d be a good fit for a new idea we’re testing out. Because you’re at a super cool company and you are (I hope) involved with handling some of the logo’d merchandise for it.
I’m sure you’re busy, so I’ll sum it up real quick: The way you’ve always had to order swag in the past completely sucks. Thus we’re going to do it differently. Here are 200 items that you can order JUST ONE of. With your logo. And it will ship within 48 hours no matter how much or how little you order. So now if you want to apologize to a co-worker for saying something offensive or inappropriate for work (as I do on a daily basis), you can give them a work appropriate logo’d item to say “I’m Sorry”.
Plus, of course, over 100,000 of the usual suspects you’d expect to see on a swag website. The pens, mugs, hats and bags that made this country great.
But wait there’s more. In addition to all the normal shirt (I said shirt. with an “r”) and mug type stuff, we have also “finely curated” a very small mix of truly unique and ultra hip products. Some of these have minimums, but we’ve separated them out into a different part of the site. It took us forever to find stuff this awesome and get the various retailers on board. Most of them didn’t get how the game is played in our industry. Now they do. And now you can enjoy the fruits of our labor by ordering them for your giveaway, gift, and employee recognition needs.
While obviously it would be particularly awesome if you actually bought some stuff, I would just as much appreciate any feedback/suggestions/ideas you have about this little idea.
Let’s break it down.
1. Introduction
She doesn’t know me. I don’t know her. She’s trying to introduce me to her business favorably and take action. I’m in the middle of a meeting and want to see if there’s anything for me to do with this email other than deleting it. So how does she get me to read all the way through without deleting the message?
The subject line is subtle, yet perfect. CloudLock is the name of our company, and “Logo’d Stuff” is something that EVERY marketer at a startup has to deal with. Whether it refers to tee shirts, graphics, conference swag, logos for journalists, etc., your company logo is something you deal with daily. Though the sender’s name isn’t familiar, there’s a 100% chance I’m going to open this.
The opening line is a challenge “So this is probably one of the stranger emails you’ll receive today…”, and it is a great ice breaker. Rather than passively reading, a line like this makes you sit up and read with curiosity.
The next thing any reader asks is “What do they want from me?” and “Why am I getting this email?”. Both of these are answered right away with an ask that doesn’t require a big commitment: “I’m sending this because we thought you’d be a good fit for a new idea we’re testing out.”
At this point I’m interested even though I have no idea what the company does. You can’t ask for more in an opening paragraph of an email.
2. Understanding the audience
The second paragraph demonstrates an intimate understanding of the target: marketing people that deal with getting stuff printed with the company logo on it. It immediately addresses the #1 problem of the target: lack of time. It then moves on to commiserate and identifies a universal problem among marketers: the fact that you have to make a big commitment and print, say, 100 tee shirts rather than just doing a handful to make sure the quality is there.
In addition, the narrative stays consistently humorous:
So now if you want to apologize to a co-worker for saying something offensive or inappropriate for work (as I do on a daily basis), you can give them a work appropriate logo’d item to say “I’m Sorry”.
The tone is dead on.
3. We’re on the same team
A lot of marketers understand their target market and can write in their language. This email takes it a step farther and makes me feel like Joy is more like a colleague than a vendor. Here’s why:
It took us forever to find stuff this awesome and get the various retailers on board. Most of them didn’t get how the game is played in our industry. Now they do.
These two sentences act to point out an external source of frustration, and talks about solving the problem for “us”.
4. The personalization
If the email stopped here, it would still be a very good one. But the personalization piece really solidifies the email and effort as great. Take a look here:
Oh and one more thing (to borrow a line from a genius who will be sorely
missed) – we set up a completely custom store just for CloudLock. Check
it out: http://cloudlock.[redacted].com.
They’ve set up a custom store that already has our logo superimposed on the items they sell. I can’t tell you how much more interesting it is when you see your actual logo on the pieces rather than a sample logo, and they’ve done this for everything they sell.
Awesome email. Just awesome.
